Our Sweet and Crazy Coonhound ...

Our Sweet and Crazy Coonhound ...
Run Free: birthdate unknown - Oct. 17 2008

Saturday, September 13, 2008

A dog's point of view

Okay, so let's say that this very high strung and anxious visitor flies into your life on the coat-strings of a hurricane.

She comes into your home.

And she makes herself comfortable in the teen-human's bedroom.


This is a room where you (as the D-O-G) have only recently re-won the privilege of h
anging out. And you have a big blue cushion on the floor, and when you are being very good and very obedient, the teen-human allows you to curl up and go to sleep. And the teen-human bosses you around alot, and you work really hard to maintain your current state of "being in good graces with the moody 16-year-old girl teen-human."

So, this visitor puts a zipped travel bag in the room. Right on top of your blue cushion. THE special blue cushion upon which you are so pleased to have earned the rights to being welcomed again.

And then you go to sleep. No one is home, except you and that V-I-S-I-T-O-R. And the travel bag is right on your cushion.

Then the visitor barges into the teen-hu
man's room (a very sacred place, which you, as a dog, are KEENLY aware of) and wakes you up and GRABS the travel bag right off of your cushion.

You see, as a DOG, you thought the TRAVEL BAG was now yours. It was, after all, on your special cushion. And, even though you have no TEETH (being the hillbilly dog that you are) and even though you can't rip the travel bag open, you have the nose-of-all-noses ... you have a HOUND DOG NOSE, and you KNOW what is in the travel bag.

You KNOW that, in the travel bag, there may be (or at least the remnants of) a:


See, you should work at the airport as a bag inspector. You should screen for contraband. You should capture and confiscate whatever your nose dictates.

You become CUJO and go after the visitor. Who, in your eyes has little to no RIGHT or AUTHORITY when it comes to being in your house, because even though you, as the DOG, are accepting that you are the bottom entity in the pack, even BELOW the teen-human, you are still IN THE PACK, the visitor
IS NOT. And you are the only pack member in the house. The pecking order, to you, as the dog is very obvious. Especially when it comes to a travel bag that involves a sandwich.

Then the teen-human comes home from cross-country, drags her tired body into her bedroom and flops on the bed. And you make the MISTAKE of growling at her. And she is ready to evict you again. PERMANENTLY. And then Man-Dad comes in, and you growl at him.
And all this time, NO ONE knows that there is a SANDWICH in the mysterious TRAVEL BAG that somehow has landed on YOUR CUSHION, and by every law in dog-dom, is now YOURS.

Until, all of a sudden, TEEN-HUMAN figures something out. She is becoming quite a DOG WHISPERER. Her relationship with the D-O-G is becoming very complicated and, actually, very special. Their friendship has been hard-won.

TEEN-HUMAN says:
"THERE MUST BE SOMETHING IN THAT TRAVEL BAG, BECAUSE BOOKER IS BEING VERY AGGRESSIVE ABOUT IT!"

And then the visitor confesses to being a sandwich horder. See, she was fleeing a hurricane, and didn't know if she would ever have a meal again.

And the travel bag is cautiously removed.

And sandwich evidence is taken away and destroyed.


And peace is returned. Booker shared the sofa with the visitor all evening, watching CNN and the Weather Channel, and didn't even think twice about the TRAVEL BAG INCIDENT.

No one is making excuses for your behavior, as a BAD DOG, but they understand it. You have food issues, and they are BIG issues, and that was really an unfair test. With all the factors of high emotional tension in the house, a visitor, invasion of territory, desertion by the rest of the pack, and inaccessible food. A very unfair test.

22 comments:

GeeRome said...

Poor Booker. It's obvious that he, and your whole family, have worked so hard to right things. I'm glad you figured out the source of the disturbance!

Lizzy said...

Booker!

I must say, I found this post quite hilarious! It sure was a serious issue, though. I'm glad the visitor figured out what was inside the bag, but it's too bad you didn't get to keep it!

Sparky

Biggie-Z said...

It's a good thing everyone understood what the issue was. When my mom came to visit, we did not leave her alone with Biggie for the first few days.

It's so helpful to look from a dog's point of view. Ifonly we knew why Biggie is peeing in the house when we leave again. Well, we know "why" but we don't know what to do about it because we don't know what is causing it, other than my leaving.

Pee.S. Thanks for the award! We'll update the blog when I'm done cleaning pee and fun stuff like that.

Anonymous said...

I hope you got cookies and cuddles after all that Booker, you deserve them, you did GREAT!

Sunny,Scooter, (sometimes Jamie) said...

Hey Booker, We've been seeing you in the comment section on lots of places we go, so we cae on over. Hey, we like you man! We're gonna be coming back, hope you don't mind if we link to you. You take care and be a good boy. You can do it.
Hugs,
Sunny, Scooter, & Jamie(the biped)

Casper and pals said...

Hey Booker we totally can relate and agree with you!

From one food crazy dog to another

woofs Casper

Patience-please said...

Hey that teen-human is a keeper! How smart was she to figure that out and they can't smell for nothing, so she had to figure it out without even using her nose. We are WAY impressed!

wags from the whippets

Rowena said...

Loved this post and the last. Poor Booker! Infringing on his territory like that!

Thank you much for the blog award. :-) I'm feeling pretty sheepish right now...being a recipient not only once or twice but thrice!? I should post more pics of the westie and doxie!

Molly the Airedale said...

You passed the test, Booker! But you lost the prize! Bummer!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Kess And Her Mama said...

What a suspenseful post! Well done Booker.

Dexter said...

Oh Booker! That sounds like such a complex situation. I would have done the same thing. I mean, there were foodables in your bed and then the strange one tried to steal them and then you were all agitated and didn't know what you were thinking. I know, I know, doggies are supposed to rise above such things and remain composed, but really, you just kind of gave a warning, right? Plus your clever girl figured it all out for you.

Slobbers,
Mango

River said...

How smart she was to figure that out! And, Booker, you were only being a doggie and looking at it from your point of view makes it all make sense! Too bad you didn't get the reward though after guarding it so faithfully!

love & wags,
River

The Devil Dog said...

Absolutely unfair! Poor Booker. We hope the peace is restored in your house very soon.

Roxy

Kathryn and Ari said...

Oh, Booker, what a rivoting story. You tried your very best--we know you did. Ari's predecessor, a stinky hound dog named Kinch, once shredded our Christmas stockings. We were so made and couldn't figure out what had come over him until my Dad sheepishly admitted he placed a rawhide bone at the bottom of one of them. 'Nuf said.

PS- This was one of the best-written stories we have ever read. We LOVED it!

Charlie Daniels said...

G'day Booker

It says the sandwich was destroyed! Does that mean nobody got it! Did you see where they put it?

Cheers

Charlie

Princess Patches said...

Poor Booker! Did they not give you some of the sandwish even after they discovered what you were guarding? You were just doing your job!

Aire-hugs,
Poppy, Penny & Patches

Henry The Great Lab said...

Hey Booker....My mom always keeps spare cookies in her pockets. She says she the only one walking around with pants with no pockets in them.

What a funny story!!

Henry The Great Lab from KY

Pedro said...

Booker,

My mom traveled back to NY last night from Texas. You would have smelled some chocolate in her travel bag. She forgot it was there until she read your blog and is finishing it up right now! Thanks so much for thinking of us during this difficult time in my family. It was nice of you to stop by and let us know we have a new friend!

Pedro

Opy - the Original GruffPuppy said...

hey,

you have been nominated for Post of the Month over at the Bone Zone - head on over and cast your vote :)

love

opy

KEY WEST COLLIES said...

Silly Hooman leaving a sandwich in her bag. Please come check our site. We have given you an award.

Essex & Deacon

Pippa said...

That's like checking out the shopping bags right?

And then taking out the important purchases?

Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

OK, Booker...we're figuring that your behavior got the hoomans all flippied out...rest assured, it's all happened here. (Um...terriers are known for their teeth...and defending their TERRIERTORY...)

Sounds like ur hoomans got ya understood and all...hmmm....foodie on ur bed...very reasonable to get a bit grumpy, we're thinkin'....

Periodically, Mumsie does this trick that we LOVE...she ADDS really high quality foodie...like cheese to our bowls WHILE we eat...then we associate hooman hands as givin' foodie...not takin' it...she's also hand fed us at times...ur teen hooman may try that for two weeks...makes her the pack leader and all...plus it makes her hand smell scrumptious...and it's alllll slimy...

Do you really have no teeth?? Hmm...where are they?

Barkin' at ya sweet Booker!!!

Laciegirl